Zanze: Help

I want nothing more than to ask

For help, yet I have no idea

How to start this most painful task

As I must acknowledge my fear

I want nothing more than

My opportunity

To walk where I have ran

From obligation free

I want nothing

Yet must take time

Never loving

This life of mine

I want

To lie and bask

Though fear will always haunt

I want nothing more than to ask

Zanze: Feeling

Feeling as though I can’t be seen

I am walked through like a doorway

I live a life that has not been

Of my life I am a stow-away.

Feeling as though I can’t

Make any more mistakes

A truth I can’t recant

Too fast to hit the brakes.

Feeling as though

My mind is blank

I want to go

But my heart sank.


A building scream

I find myself kneeling

Feeling as though I can’t be seen.


Sonnet: Lost Tradition

White-clad cottages, stand like dominoes

Each one integral, each one unique

The land they stand on archaic, antique

Their owners tend to the cattle who low,


In the communal fields shared down below

The seeds of grass, stolen by a crow’s beak

Returning to a nest over a creek,

Does little to the fields. The grass will grow.


Long may the cattle continue to graze,

In the fields tended by man may they remain.

There comes a time when we must change our ways,

Or admit that we find ourselves in pain.


The old ways were the best ways. My high praise,

For lost tradition, is never the same.

Sonnet: Happy Anniversary

How many times did I say, ‘I love you?’

Clearly it wasn’t enough for either,

A fight for love, a fight for us? Neither,

We fought each other with fierce words untrue.


I once said that I would look after you,

I did not mean to be a deceiver.

In me you were never a believer.

So as I prepare to live without you,


I must take this moment to say to you,

Happy Anniversary my lost love.

My heart is glad that we were together,

During the time that you allowed love to

Show us the way. Before you disposed of

Us, our relationship, altogether.

Sonnet: Formerly Known As Love

I can no longer hold you in my heart

The last touch, last kiss, I am torn apart. 

I love only memory, time now past,

To be with you now would leave me aghast.


Yet you won’t leave my mind, your face, your smell

Our last words spoken my personal hell.

I will never forget that piercing glare

Looking away I could still feel them stare. 


Judgement, resentment, a harrowing hate

Hindsight makes me ask, “But why did I wait?”

I waited for love, a desire to stay

By your side, yet you chose to cast away.


All that we had, and all that we had done

A memory now, a former loved one.

Sonnet: Goodbye Mother

The difference between sickness and death,

The same as breathing and that final breath.

Remarkable in its finality,

Comfort and grief, a strange duality.


From my world of hurt, pain unlike any other

Repress the pain of losing a mother.

It cannot be done I have come to learn

To get by yourself you have to discern.


A new path. Unlocked, without her guidance,

Staying true to course, avoid subsidence.

Darkness awaits the hearts of those who fall

Those who obsess over that final call.


Goodbye is hard, but suffering harder,

Permission to pass, no need to martyr.

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